Chapter 1
Bitter Sweet Freakin Reminders

Have you ever been in love? Like really in love? Have you ever had someone you love, die? What about watch them die? Like I did, I watched Kimberly die. Her last breathe in my arms, her blood on my shirt. You probably haven’t witnessed that kind of death. When I picked her up that night, a drive by shooting was the last thing I imagined happening. But it happened, and he killer her.

“So where are you taking her?” Kimberly’s older brother Stephen Watson asked me as I waited for her. I had been dating her for years now…and they were just getting use to me. So I was allowed to wait for her inside, instead of her porch.
“They new exhibit at the museum, she had been bugging about it forever.” I said, and then noticed that Stephen was nodding in agreement.
“Oh, I know man. She wont shut up, she will go on and on about something that had been dead and gone for hundreds of yea-” Kimberly couched to let us know she had heard Stephen. Hopefully not me. “Hey ya sis’” Stephen finished, leaving the room.
“Hey, you ready?” I asked as she made her way down the stares.
“Of course.”
“Lets go then.” She took my arm as we walked to the car, that’s when she gave me the ‘hello’ kiss.
“So, where are we going?”
“Surprise.”
“Nat, I hate surprises.” She informed me.
“I know, but you wont hate this one, promise.” I winked at her, she rolled her eyes. She always loved my surprises.
“Ugh, just tell me!” she demanded.
“Nope.”
“Nathan, please” she pleaded.
“Not giving in, Kim. You’re gone have to wait this time.” I laughed; she just moaned and turned up the radio to stop any future conversation. “Oh, come on.” I turned down the radio. “You are going to love this surprise. Guarantee it.” I said reaching for her hand. I pulled into a parking space.
“Im sure I will, but I don’t like surprises.” I kissed her forehead before she could continue. “Fine, I’ll try.” I smiled victory. She ran her hand on my chin, which reminded me I forgot to shave, damn it! I thought, she laughed. Then pulled be in, of course we had to unbuckle to kiss. Which ruined the moment, she agreed.
“Can you tell me now?”
“Why can’t you just are quiet and let me surprise you? It is your birthday.” I reminded her as we got out of the car. I ran up behind her to place her hands over her eyes so she wouldn’t know where we were going. She let out a shriek. Then admitted defeat, she placed her hands on my wrist as we walked.
“Why can’t you just let me see where we are? I am a total klutz you know that right?” she asked trying to remove my hands from her eyes. I started to laugh.
“You trust me don’t you? I wont let you fall Kim, relax.” I told her, kissing her cheek. She moaned, it was her sixteenth birthday and I planned on taking her to the Lexington Art Museum. She had been bugging about going forever, that I decided to surprise her.
“I trust you, Nat.” she said releasing her hand from mine. I pulled her from the sidewalk and into the corner of an alley; I leaned in to kiss her. I felt her hand run up my shirt and I felt her hair in between my fingers. She stopped, “What’s that siren?” I told her to be quiet as I listened, sure enough. The near by Jewelry Store was being robbed; I could see them in the distance. Black shadows, running into a red van. “Nathan?” she asked, panicked running back into my arms.
“Come here, Kim. And be quiet!” I ordered, I let go of her and took stepped toward the scene.
“Nathan Lee Smith! Don’t you dare go over there!” she yelled at me, I turned around on my heels to hug her. The sound off skidding tires interrupted my movement. The van pulled away from the Jewelry Store and headed in our direction. I grabbed her arm and pulled her into the shadows of the alley. “Don’t you dare leave me, Nathan!” she ordered. I sat down next to her on the wet pavement. The red van came near the mouth of the alley; I turned her to where she was on my lap. She saw them…
“Nathan, I know that guy!” she yelled. She ran off my lap, heading toward the van, pulling out her phone.
“Kim! No!” I yelled after her, the male in the passenger seat saw us. He obviously recognized her, and pulled the trigger. There were two large sounds, like fireworks, exploding in my ears. After that there was sudden screams. Kimberly slowly turned around letting my see her two wounds from a distance. She slowly looked down, and then fell. I still didn’t comprehend the fact that she leaped off my lap, out of my protection. I ran to her side, two shots in the middle of her chest. “Call 911!” I ordered at the already frantic crowed. I felt someone next to me, talking to the operator.
“I know who did it, Nat.” she gasped, blood started to ripple out of her mouth. I tear escaped from my eyes. She wiped it away with her bloody hand.
“Kimberly?” I asked for a response. She just smiled up at me, her green eyes closing. “Kim!” I shook her for a response.
“I love you, Nathan.” She said in her last breath. She coughed up more blood. In the distance I could hear the ambulance. “Forever…”
“And always, right?” I said through my tears. She was actually dieing in my arms. My Kimberly is dieing. And it was my fault.
“Of course, Nat, I'll love you forever.” She said faintly. The Ambulance pulled up, a man came to place her on the stretcher. I fallowed with nothing else to do. I pulled me softly, with what little strength she had left. “Forever and always.” She whispered in my ear. The man who was taking her away from me allowed me to ride with them to the hospital.
“Kim?” I asked, knowing this was her last moment.
“Do me something Nat.” she requested, I looked up slowly at her face that was now covered in blood.
“Yea Kim, I'll do anything.” I said kissing her forehead.
“Don’t waist time on me…on me dying. Don’t cry for me that long, you know my family would need you, and you still have your life to live” She reached for my other hand, which I happily gave to her. I didn’t answer, just shook my head still in denial of this entire incident. “Promise, Nathan!” she yelled. She squeezed as the surgeon looked at her wounds that I refused to look at.
“I promise, Kim.” I said looking away, I wasn’t sure if I could keep that promise.
“She’s leaving us!” the man yelled at the driver. I looked back at her, her smile was getting larger. She motioned for me to come closer. Her breaths were getting shorter.
“Henry, Henry Davidson did this.” She spoke softly. My eyes widened at her words. Henry Davidson was the star-football player at our high school and Kimberly’s ex-boyfriend. He did this; she touched my cheek with her bloody hand. Which was what she normally did when I was about to get in a fight, telling me to calm down. I noticed her breathes getting briefer. She was nearly gone. “Tell everyone, I love them. I love you too, Nathan.” She gasped, blood trickled out of her mouth. “Forever.” She gulped, almost there. “Forever and alw-” her voice faded, her eyes closed, and her grasp on my hand loosened. One single tear feel down her bloody cheek. She was dead, I ran from the thought.
“Forever and Always, Kimberly. I know, I love you too.” I kissed her limp hand; we were a few minutes from the hospital by now.
“She’s gone! Hurry!” the man yelled at the driver. He turned at me and spoke in whispers, I didn’t let go of her hand, and I rested my head on the bed where she laid dead, lifeless. I stayed there for the rest of the ride, refusing to look at her face. “She is gone, we can’t do anything now. She lost too much blood. The police are waiting to question you, but you can wait.” He placed his hand on my already bloody shirt. I shrugged him off.
“No. I can do this.” My voice, even I could tell I was angry. I walked slowly out of the ambulance to be greeted my Kimberly’s crying family. Her older brothers; Michael and Stephen were crying, which confused me because they were both huge. Her mother, Anne watched as they pulled Kimberly’s lifeless body inside. Her dad, Michael senior came toward me. I was speechless, so I decided to apologize. “I am so sorry, I should have done something. But she just took off, and then—” I paused; I noticed he wasn’t angry; I flung his huge arms around me patting my back.
“We know, son.” After a moment of two he spoke again. “We know she loved you, she would hate us forever if we even thought about blaming you. The police are waiting to question you.” He released me; I stopped myself from looking at Kimberly’s mom. I headed inside, I told the police everything. From the van, to the name Kim gave me. And about her and Henrys really dramatic break up, and everything she told me in the ambulance. I spent the next week blocking my family and friends out. Refusing to call anyone, or answer any phone calls. On the day of her funeral, I stood like a statue, not speaking.
When everyone left, I cried over her tomb stone, giving her a daisy, even though she thought all flowers were a waste of money. But I would always buy her one anyways, and she would always love it. I walked slowly back to my car. The fallowing week was Henrys prosecution, I was asked to speak on the stand. I agreed, knowing the only reason was anger. Two days later, Henry was sent away. I didn’t bother. I was upset that my mom wouldn’t let me out of the house to go look for him. I wanted to kill him, and all his buddies that were in the van.
The Jewelry store donated a diamond necklace to the Watson family. Her mother insisted that she wore it on her funeral. Even though she was dead, Kimberly looked beautiful. Her red, orange hair was pinned back with her grand mother’s pins. Her hair was curled and pulled back behind her ears. She wore a simple black dress, and her diamond earrings. Kimberly’s mom let me have her charm bracelet back. Along with other things, they called me one day and told me that they’re leaving.
Moving away from all of this, I wish I could. I went to Kim’s old room and found the shoe box filled with letters, notes, and pictures I had given her through out the years. After saying goodbye to the Watson Family, and the memories Kim and I shared on her bed, in her room, together I began to burn everything that reminded me of her. All but; her gold charm bracelet and her green sweater she left in my car that night. I placed them in her shoe box, and hid them in the bottom of my closet.
I began to refuse to look at them.
Never before had I experienced a love so elemental, and I was going to make sure that no one would replace her. I would lock my heart away, and hide it in my closet with what I had left of Kimberly.
My one and only true love.
I lay down on my bed, still wearing jeans and the shirt Kim gave my a few moths ago. I could hear my heart beating in my ears. I let my eyes close, and I saw Kimberly behind my eye lids. Like I always did, keep your promise, Nathan. Her voice told me. I couldn’t keep it, I would always remember her. And nothing, no one, would ever change that. I grabbed my i-pod and hit play. I realized a slow, love song was playing, our song. I went through the list of playlist, MONDAYS, Ramble On…, and Kimberly. I frowned, and then just picked a random song, turned the volume up as high as it could go. Knowing, that soon I would fall asleep and maybe this would all be a dream. Maybe, not.
“Nathan?” a small, concerned voice called from the other side of my door. I wouldn’t have known until the split second break between a song.
“What?!” I asked, sort of screaming. It was my mom.
“I don’t know if you want to know this, but a new family moved into the Watson’s. I know your hurt, Nathan but I want you to take this pie to them.” I stared at my mom, open eyed.
“What? No! I wont ever go back in there!” I said placing my head into a pillow. Like I did when I was younger. When I wasn’t in love.
“Nathan, you need to get over this. I know you loved her, but-” I cut her off.
“No, mom! I cant just go back in there. Maybe someday in the future, maybe. But I cant right now. I just cant!” I yelled then, I saw the look on her face. It was the same face she had when my dad died. “Im sorry mom, ok. I’ll go and take it, okay?” I asked, she smiled weakly then walked back down stares to the kitchen.
“There are three of them. Harold is the husband, Julie, is the mother or wife. And lily she’s sixteen. They are the Darling’s.” she informed me, I laughed. I remembered the Peter Pan story so well, the Darling’s. “Be have, Nathan!” she yelled. I knew she was just happy to see me smile. The Darling’s (ha-ha) lived three blocks down; I use to always walk to pick up Kimberly when she was grounded. I didn’t want to bother with my car, it still smelt like Kimberly. I walked, which gave me time to think.
On the way there, I saw then bus bench where Kimberly and I engraved N