The amount of pain that follows you just because you didn’t have a “normal” childhood is crazy. You look around your community and most everyone's lives seem to be going great, granted you don't know everything that goes on in their household, you still see the love and the support they receive from their parents through thick and thin. As time goes on, you start being your own person but you still don't receive that love that you've been aching for for such a long time. When you stop yourself from discussing your life, asking them questions about something as small as going to get a snack from the store or hanging out with a friend; when your first reaction is to lie when they ask you about your whereabouts, you know things are f***ed. Most girls tend to be close with their moms and tend to share their secrets and their minor inconveniences and get actual help to fix whatever problem that they have, you don't fall into “ most girls”. Holding you back from common conversations about your home life because you're scared that having a “different” lifestyle will make your friends dislike you and talk behind your back so you make up fake stories, just to fit in. As you make up these stories, you start imagining yourself in this parallel universe that is inside your head and realize how different things would be if you were part of that reality.