Have you ever wanted to hurt somebody so painfully for absolutely no reason? No? Well, this has nothing to do with that. It’s about one of the weirdest plane flights you will ever hear in your entire life. This is a true story about something that happened not too long ago. Ok, picture this, you are on a solo flight to visit your dad in Pennsylvania, and you are sitting next to this, early-20’s guy. He is wearing a blue t-shirt, black sweatpants, Nike shoes, he has long hair and glasses with a black frame. Soon after taking off, the woman with the food cart came around wearing her Flight Attendant outfit and was taking orders. You order 3 packets of Welch’s variety gummies. Now did I mention you are flying alone… next to some weird guy in his 20’s?!?!?! Ok, back on track... Imagine you are waiting for the snacks to come and you were watching Shrek 3 on your movie player, and this odd guy next to you leaned over and said, “Hey kid, can I watch with you?”. And I was scared out of my mind because my main goal was to have no human interaction, just so they don’t find out that I am, indeed, an alien. Now keep in mind that, Shrek 3 is my most favorite movie in the entire world, and I wanted nothing but to be in the moment where it is just Shrek and I, but this person was barging in on my moment and I wanted to scream because this was so near and dear to me. Sorry for getting off track again, next time you should tell me when I steer away. Ok, eventually after crying on the inside, you say to this man, “Sure, I guess?” and this took all of your effort to say because you didn’t want to be rude. That was all that was said for about 3 minutes.

 Finally when your snacks arrived, you take a packet of gummies and continued watching your god-like movie(I believed that the people behind this movie are basically gods to me and that I worship Shrek and Shrek is my religion, I also remember the delicious taste of the gummy bears and how they would squish in between my teeth). Then all of a sudden this Harry Potter and Gremlin offspring next to you takes a packet of gummies and eases his head on your shoulder. I remember the sound of this man opening a packet of gummies. I almost cried because I’m fat and I love to eat food and he took my food. I took 30 seconds to assess the situation when I yanked my shoulder out of his caressing cheek that felt like a 10-pound weight, and we engaged in what seemed to be a non-consensual staring contest for about 3 minutes. I know that this seems to be quite funny but I know that I recall almost crapping my pants. I remember thinking to myself, did this weak human species, man, just take my gelatin sugar animal?  After 3 minutes of our Roman Style Battle of the Brains, and our ever-lasting deathmatch, you finally said “Can you like, not?” and that was the end of your conversation on that flight. Finally, the flight was over, I sat up got my stuff and was on my way out of this awkward situation. When I got my bag I saw six packets of gummies. Turns out that he ordered three packets of gummies as well and I ate two of his and mine were behind my movie player. This shows that sometimes it isn’t always best to be nice to people, especially if they are making you uncomfortable. And check and make sure that you aren’t eating someone else’s gummies.