It was the hardest decision my mom had ever taken. It was the beginning of the summer 2012. It broke my moms heart and mine. I really didn't know how my life would change without him. He is my baby brother even though he is just 2 years younger.  We always argued how he was annoying; how I was always manipulative; sometimes we argued about things that were really stupid, but thats what siblings do. We had never been separated before but yet we never really showed affection to each other. Yet, knowing that my mom decided to send him to Colombia to go live with my dad; I didn't want him to leave. I knew thought it would be the best for him. Ever since the day my dad  stayed in Colombia my family was separated and we all suffered.

I remember 2009, what was supposed to be a great first time going back to my country became the vacation that separated my family. It started off great, after four years I finally got to see my cousins, my aunts, my uncles, and my grandmothers. When I went to my grandmother’s house from my moms side, I remembered how I used to see it as the biggest house in the world; a palace but I was a toddler back then so then at that moment I realize it wasn't as big as I thought. I got to eat all the food I missed eating so much, my favorites thought was tamales, fritanga, and lechona. My cousins would take us to their soccers games where they would always win and every time one of them scored they would dedicate it to me and my brother which made us feel special. My parents would try to take us to different places to get to know the beautiful city of Bogota where I was born. My favorite place to go with my mom and dad was a huge park called Simon Bolivar. Since I was a baby my parents would take me there mostly every weekend and then when my little brother was born I had someone to play with. That park had brought me back so many happy memories.

My vacation was going perfect but then a week before the perfect vacation was about to end my dad made the decision that he did not want to come back to the U.S.. He was not happy where we lived he wished we would stay here in Colombia with him but we couldnt. It wasn't because he didn't love my mom or us it was just living in the U.S was to hard for him. I remember crying, I couldn't believe it. I was daddy's little girl; I was always with him; he would always spoil me.  My Mom, my Dad, me and my brother we would always be together; we would go everywhere together. I kept crying and crying, hugging my dad begging him not to stay. The four of us were just there crying together just hugging for an hour locked in a room. It was just so hard to imagine how life would be without my Dad. It was just so hard seeing the four of us crying and suffering. I had never gone through anything like that before. I remember the four of us praying together to God so that everything would be okay.

There was no way of enjoying the rest of the week before we left. The four of us tried to spend the most time together that we could. We started making plans to go back to the U.S and sell everything we had to come back to Colombia and live with my dad while he looked for a job and looked for somewhere where we could live. As it got closer to the day we had to leave my family wanted to take us to the airport; everyone knew that the moment My mom, my brother and I had to say goodbye to my Dad It was going to be hard on all of us. Everyone knew how close we were with my Dad and did not want to see us separate. When the day arrived, we went to my grandmothers houses to say goodbye to the family and then to the airport. It was only the four of us; we all had red runny noses and watery eyes. The moment to say goodbye to my Dad came. I hugged him so hard not wanting to let go my brother wanted to hug him too. We all broke into tears not knowing what was going to happen with us or when were we going to see each other again.

When we got back to New Britain no one could believe my dad had stayed. People started to criticizing him and that hurt us. Each day got harder and harder, we missed him more and more. Each night we would call him and talk until the calling card would run out of minutes, yet we felt empty without him.Things started to change, my Mom had to work harder now since she was the only one providing for us. My little brother became quieter, shyer, and kept to himself more. I dont know why but I became rebellious; I would always argue with my Mom and brother and try to do whatever I wanted. Life for us became harder, my Mom couldn't keep up with the bills anymore so we had to move to the projects. I hated the fact that we had to move, I lived in that apartment for many years where I had so many memories with my Dad. After a few months I got frustrated and didn't want to talk on the phone with my Dad anymore only when my Mom made me. I guess I was so hurt from everything that I started to grow apart from my family. As time when on I was in my own world, I started high school so I was always with my friends and playing soccer. I never spent time with my family anymore, even when my aunts and cousins came from Colombia to visit I would rather be with my friends. I started to get in trouble, and to do bad in school. I didn't care anymore.

Two and a half years had passed since my dad had stayed in Colombia. My mom decided that for christmas we would go back to Colombia to see my Dad. My attitude towards him changed completely. I started to blame him for all the suffering we went through. I remember that in less than the an hour after arriving to Colombia, I was already arguing with him. Everything he would say I would say the opposite. He wanted chinese food; I wanted chicken. He wanted to go home; I wanted to go out. He wanted to go out; I wanted to go to home. I tried doing the most I could to make him mad. I remember thinking “why should he tell me what to do if he had left us and made us suffer.” I did have a great time in Colombia though, Christmas and New Years was unbelievable especially getting to celebrate it with all my family. As the days went on my dad tried to soften me up with him. He always tried being nice and getting me the little things I liked with the little money he had. I saw how he was and I did become nicer to him. Everyday he started to buy me a little Colombian chocolate bar called Jet which I loved, not one single day did he not buy me one. Thats when I realized that he wasn't a bad guy. I realized that from everything that happened he was suffering too; I was still his daddys little girl and he stilled loved me like before. I started thinking how he was by himself, atleast I was still with my mom and my brother, he had no one. We got closer again.

The rest of the trip was fun, I got to visit some of my cousins out of the city,  ride horses and play soccer. But then, Again it got to the moment when we had to say goodbye to my dad. It was hard but I guess not as hard as the first time.

We got back to New Britain and then my brother started to act different, he became really sad, depressed, he didn't want to do anything anymore.  It got so bad that he stop wanting to go to school, and if he did teacher caught him crying in class. We  didn't know what was wrong, we didn't know what to do. I couldn't see my brother like that, It was sad seeing him suffer like that. His behavior went on for several months, That was when my mom made the decision of sending him to Colombia.  The moment my mom told him he was going back to colombia he got happier.I wondered why would he wanted to go back, we live way better here. Why would he live my mom? He would have a great future here. All I could think about was will he be happy over there, I just wanted him to be happy, I hated seen him sad and depressed. It hurt me to see him like that. Now It was only going to be me with my mom and my brother with my dad. My family was going to be separated in half. I remember thinking it was enough losing my dad but now my brother. I remember that after he left I was so sad and it was even worse seen my mom crying every night of how much she missed him.

I really wondered why did this happen to my family ,why did we have to get separated. Why have I had to see my family suffer so much that it hurt me. I don't know those answers. Its been 3 years since my brother left to Colombia he does seem really happy there. Ever since he left our relationship changed, I missed arguing with him. He played such  big part of my life growing up and I hadn't realized it. I have noone to play soccer with all the time, every time that it snows I have to stay home cause I dont have who to play in the snow with. He would always annoy me but try to make me smile, I realized how much me and him loved each other. We have gotten so close even though we are 2559.6 miles apart. The last time I saw him was in may when he came here for a little while. During that little while me and him we were inseparable, always hugging, laughing, making jokes and playing around. All I want is to be with my little brother again and with my Dad and Mom. I love them so much and, hopefully with all the sacrificing we have gone through  we will able to be together again.  Maybe we will be able to buy a little house in Colombia so that we have so a place on our own . I learned to value my family  to see how important they are to me.