My heart stopped.

“What do you mean, it’s over?”

“I mean, I can’t be your friend anymore. It’s just too weird knowing that… well… you know. I just can’t do it.”

I stared into her topaz eyes. So very much like our favorite character in a series we read, they melted like honey. Warm and flowing…. Conquering my mind. All this time… I had thought…. It would be okay to express my true feelings to her. And now… this.

“But… you said…”

She held up her hand to stop me.

“I never said anything. Forget it, okay?”

My hands were locked together over my chest. My heart felt like it was about to rip itself out.

“B-But…”

My lip trembled. This wasn’t happening… it couldn’t… this couldn’t be real. We were friends…. Couldn’t we at least stay that way?

“No. I’m sorry for everything. Getting your hopes up and crap… you know. I just don’t feel the same way. So get over it.”

She walked away. Just like that. Tears that had built in my eyes were now streaming down my cheeks. I stood silently, staring ahead, not daring to look back at her. A few people passed, hurrying to their classes. My chest was pounding, hurting, crying… Why did she do this? As I turned to my classroom, I glanced gently down the hall. There she was, talking away like nothing was wrong. Regretting my curiosity, I walked into the class. I sat down at my desk and buried my face in my arms. The rest of today, even though there was just an hour left, would be long.

(Later that day…)


I nearly fell back on my bed, iPod already blasting in my ears. I closed my eyes, trying to block everything else out. It didn’t matter. Everything about her was an infinite scar indented on my heart. I rolled onto my side, putting my right hand on my left arm. My skin was so pale… It reminded me of how we used to compare how our tones contrasted.

“You need to get out in the sun!” she would joke. I wasn’t much of an outside person.
The phone rang. I paused my song, which was “Sweet Sacrifice” by Evanescence, and picked it up.
“Hello?” I answered.
“I-I’m…. so s-s-sorry….”
The voice on the other end was shaky, but extremely recognizable. She was calling. She was apologizing. The right thing to do would be to forgive her. But I didn’t have time to remember that. All of my sadness quickly changed to anger. How dare she? How dare she call me after everything she put me through and expect me to just be sympathetic for her just like that?
“What do you want?”
“I s-said…. I’m s-sorry… I didn’t mean everything earlier… I just…”
“If you didn’t mean it, you shouldn’t have said it!” I nearly shouted into the phone, and quickly hung up on her. I didn’t want to hear it right now. And there was nothing she could do about it.