The Unseen side | Teen Ink

The Unseen side

April 29, 2024
By Autumn_1432 SILVER, Cannon Falls, Minnesota
Autumn_1432 SILVER, Cannon Falls, Minnesota
7 articles 0 photos 0 comments

The stories on the news, all the kids were found in poor conditions. They were neglected for such a long time. They look so pale almost to the point of pure white faces. They were so malnourished that their bones were showing through the skin. How could anyone do this to a child? They are so little and still developing. This is a form of child abuse. On May 19, 2022, Mayo Clinic wrote an article on child abuse called “Child Abuse”, It gives many examples of what can happen after a child gets abused. The symptoms that follow after the abuse, signs that they are going through abuse, and prevention of child abuse. The stories are a nightmare to hear about. Abuse isn’t pretty for anyone who goes through it no matter what type it is. There are resources but they are very few and not many people know about them. We need to get more resources because abuse isn’t going anywhere, anytime soon. Before we even start talking about solutions we need to know what we are up against. 

One of the types is physical abuse. This is the one people are most familiar with because this is the type that is on the news a lot. Physical abuse is hitting, punching, or anything that deals with physical harm. Another type is mental abuse. This is also similar to emotional abuse, but they are both non-physical abuse. The Domestic Abuse Hotline wrote an article in 2020 called “What is Emotional Abuse?” This article explains what emotional abuse is and some signs to tell if there is an abusive relationship. “Mental abuse can be isolating and it is meant to control you.” says the Domestic Abuse Hotline. Moving on with another type of abuse is sexual abuse. This is very closely related to physical abuse but is a bit different. Sexual abuse can involve unwanted sex and touching in those places. More people tend to know sexual and physical abuse more than mental and financial abuse, which will be the last one I will be talking about. Financial abuse has to do with money. This is when someone uses someone else for money and won’t pay them back for it. This doesn’t include paying for someone at a restaurant or buying something for someone. This one is the least well-known type of abuse. People who go through abuse sometimes share their stories to help others speak up and that is part of a solution to the problem at hand, so I will be sharing some stories of those who went through abuse.
Shelby Grace also known as Shubble online had an abusive boyfriend, who is now her ex. His name is William Patrick Spencer Gold, he’s more commonly known as Wilber Soot. I will be referring to him as Shelby’s ex for the rest of the time. On February 24, 2024, Shelby started a Twitch stream talking about her abusive ex. She said he would bite her and it started as playful but towards the end of the relationship, it turned into something much worse. He “made” a safe word they could use if he was biting too hard. At first, he would listen for it then stop but as he kept going, he would use it to hurt her more. “I thought he was caring about me but I realize now that he was trying to hurt me,” said Shubble in her stream. She didn’t think it was that bad enough to be abused. This was a form of physical abuse but it wasn’t hitting or punching, it was biting to the point of bruises. This was not a healthy relationship at all. She is not the only story I want to share though.
 On April 18th, 2018, Ruth Davies, who works for Savelife, posted a story of a young girl’s abuse story called Sophie*’s story. This is not her real name; they changed it for privacy. Sophie and her ex started to date when they were around the age of fifteen. “He was trying to go at a pace much quicker than I wanted to move at that stage,” said Sophie. The first big red flag she saw was when he forced her into having sex with him. He was also very controlling of her and forced into a lot of stuff that she constantly said no to. She had an eye-opening moment when he was drunk and pinned her to the ground after she said no. She is no longer with him anymore after that incident. Again there is a pattern with abuse victims not getting the help they so desperately need. The last story I will tell is about another YouTuber. 
He is one of Tommyinnits friends. His name is Freddie. This story goes that he was out at the bar one night and at the bar, there was one man that kept buying him drinks. He was grateful and brushed it off. Later, he ordered an Uber and was going to get home. He leaves the bar, only to have that same guy who bought him drinks follow him. He asked why he was following him and the guy started to flirt with him. He started to reach into his pants. Freddie ripped his hand out and told him to leave him alone. This guy started to go at it again and eventually got to the front and touched him. He got him off and went home. I wanted to share this story because I wanted to make a point that not all abuse happens to girls. This can happen to guys too. All people who go through abuse suffer through it and it is not pretty, especially some of the side effects.
In 2023, the European Journal of Psychotraumatology wrote an article about abuse victims with mental health issues. “Half of the victims presented with a history of mental health problems,” said the article. These victims are suffering without the help they need. They can be suffering from PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) and/or depression. PTSD is a condition when flashbacks occur to a traumatic event. Depression also can come with being abused along with an eating disorder. An eating disorder is a type of mental illness that includes people worrying about how they look or their health and trying to lose weight in a very unhealthy way. Another thing about eating disorders is that they can also involve overeating or stress eating. This can lead to them not eating enough in a day, which leads to having problems with their health, or too much eating that leads to different health problems. This can be treated but it takes time. Abuse can cause paranoia about the person who they got abused by. They start thinking of the “what if’s” and that comes with anxiety. Abuse is horrible and it keeps causing more problems than it's worth. 
I believe there is a solution for this but it’s not one big magical solution. This solution must have multiple smaller solutions. Ayi VandiKwaghe, Federal Ministry of Agriculture and Rural Development, had one of her articles published on November 17, 2023, titled “Access to Therapy for Child Sexual Abuse Survivors”, and said: “For abuse survivors, access to therapy is challenging due to stigma (legal guardian).” Therapy being more available is going to be a major part of helping abuse survivors. There are lots of types of therapy for abuse: Art, group, trauma, and individual. Having therapy for someone can relieve stress and anxiety. It can also just be someone to talk to things about and work them through. Another thing that is going to be helpful is having a support group. These people will be open to hearing everything without judging, but they want to try and help. This can help improve their mood and also be less stressed about keeping it a secret. All these things can help no matter how small they may seem. 
Abuse can start as little red flags people are willing to ignore because they say in the name of love or red flags they just decide to ignore. Abuse can be a scary thing to go through, like what Shelby, Freddie, or Sophie went through. It is very traumatic. A lot of side effects come along with being abused and they can make people feel less than human. Some of the side effects are PTSD and eating disorders. Mental illnesses are no joking matter and it is also a side effect of abuse. This is why we need to get more resources out there for abuse victims to use and have access to. If they have more of what they need. They could start feeling better and even lighter. So much worry would be lost and they would be free to do more things. Action will speak louder than words, so let's make them count. 



JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.