A Letter Of Self Made Secrecy | Teen Ink

A Letter Of Self Made Secrecy

March 31, 2016
By vanessagabrielle_ BRONZE, Fort Myers, Florida
vanessagabrielle_ BRONZE, Fort Myers, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I want to live and feel all the shades, tones, and variations of mental and physical possible in my life. and I am horribly limited." - Sylvia Plath


I feel like I am standing on the nearest nook of a cliff, with the wind blowing itself into a perpetual proximity of despise. I am made bold, but the numbness inside of me refuses to leave.
I am frozen. I am stuck. I am beaten. I am battered.

I am everything in between the words “hate” and “love”, “sorrow” and “glee.”

I am reaching for galaxies in a wondrous space whilst I am still on the pitiful tables of Earth. I am running, jumping, crawling, dragging myself towards Saturn’s rings, singing songs of melancholy while I gasp for air. I don’t want to be here, but I don't want to die. Unless death is full of vibrancy and sunflowers and proclaimed curiosity. I want something from this world, something that the world doesn’t offer.

I do not want to search high and low for a mere rock of hate. I want to adventure for a stone of glory, a stone of healing, a stone of hopeless romance and hopeful smiles. I want to feel the green of the world inside of my stomach, I want the oceans to cleanse my brain and soar out of my ears as I smile a childish smile. I want to consume felicity and feel redolence. I do not want my mind to be my home for much longer, I want to escape. I want liberation, I want resilience. I long for passion to be traced down the con-caves of my body. I covet for the dissonance of innocence I once had to return to its home inside of my bruised soul. I desire for my insides to parachute through inquiry.

I need this distant void that lies so powerfully between who I am and the self I don’t see to slam shut.


The author's comments:

About one year ago, I wrote this piece. About ten months ago, I performed it at a poetry slam. Now, I have never been very theatrical. I'm shy, I don't talk to others unless they talk to me first, and being on a stage in front of people has never been my thing, but when I performed this piece, I got a taste of the feeling I was longing for. 

For me, this is my prophecy. I want greatness, and this piece helped me to attain some of that. 


Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.